Friday, November 29, 2013

yesterday, Thanksgiving Day

I bought these small blue legal pads just before I went into the hospital for the mastectomies, thinking I would have something poignant to say in those early waking moments, but I was mundane, and just want to get on with it.
Now I write in them when I'm away from the computer (where I usually write), only to put them on the computer eventually.  Like the joke at the bottom of this says:  "I have nothing to say."  "You should blog about it."
Evie has some water colors in an old palette.  Took some shots of that.  We still have morning hair and disarray or I'd take a couple of pics of us.  Maybe later, when we're feasting.
Taking pics of 3 of the 5 cats, too.  The 3 girls; Cassie, Kohlette, and Sapphire.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

late november

Late November.  I think of my novel and  how late November occurred more than once.  I liked the idea of snow always being in the offing.  And it snowed a lot in that book.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day.  My mother is in the nursing home, and will be there till the end of January, they say.  She has an infection in the bone where the decubitis ulcer is located (on her sacrum).  She is devastated, thinking she will have to stay there forever.  We tell her that's not so, that she will go home.  She's too vibrant not to.
So, that is hard.  She will be there for Christmas and New Years.  Such a damn long time.

Theresa is making the Thanksgiving feast, but has little room in her apt this year, so me and Evie will get delivered food from her when Melissa is on her way home.  Can't wait.

Me and Ev are now just hanging out on the bed, me writing, her drawing one of her Ladies in Hats.  Bordeaux Red.
There's a clock on 86th Street that plays bells now and then.  I can't make out the tune, though.

Going into my second week off chemo.  I feel a lot better.  It starts up again monday, the 2nd.  This will be right about the time I'll start losing my hair.  Sort of the face of cancer, isn't it?  Nothing much I can do about that.
I have a precious online friend (for some 15+years), who is a knitter, and she's making me a couple of hats.  Can't wait to see them.
Bought myself a couple of bandannas already.  It'll be a whole new thing covering the head like that.

Evie probably thinks I am writing something profound here, as she adds color to the page.  She'll say "Well, it was sorta profound" after hearing it, knowing she's pushing it.  Ha ha.

Wishing you all the happiest Thanksgiving.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

the continuing saga

My world is mainly focused on breast cancer, and getting rid of it.  There is not much else on my mind.  But, my poor mother was admitted to the hospital again, with inflammation of the bone where her bed sore is.  It's a bad situation, and I feel so damn bad for her.  I have 3 doctors days next week, including one operation (to get the port) on wednesday, so I won't be visiting much.  The following week starts my chemotherapy (on the 18th) for the next 8 weeks.  After that, it's radiation for  6-7 weeks, the radiological oncologist said, 5 friggin days a week.  Learned all the many horrible side effects of radiation the other day.  The one that bothers me the most, besides the burning peeling skin, is that it could mess up the cosmetic results of the reconstruction.  Does it ever end?  Have an ENT appointment tuesday, because something was "spotted" on the PET (they didn't tell me this at first) in my throat.  I have had GERD for many many years, and I'm hoping it's just a nodule of some sort that's benign.  I certainly don't want to hear of more cancer, that will flip me out.

Friday, November 1, 2013

a day late and a dollar short

A day late, but here are a couple of pics of Logan on Halloween, and with his mom.  She said he had a great time, and made out well, trick or treating along 3rd avenue, with a couple of buddies.  He's just getting so big!  My darling Superman, Logan.

Hmm, couldn't post the one of Mel and Logan... had copied it from Facebook, where Mel had posted it.  Sometimes that happens with pics copied from FB... something's up with their file codes, I guess.
So... it's November!  This year just went whoooooosh.  Still in recoup mode after the operation, which is not much different than the mode I'm usually in, hehe.  Truth.  Had one drain removed yesterday, but the other is still going strong, so hopefully by next week it will be out.  As part of reconstruction, I started to get "filled" in the expanders.... the nurse injected 150ccs of saline into each expander ... this stretches the skin in preparation for the implant, and is done for weeks to months, every week.  I was told there would possibly be pain, but it's not much different than the tightness that's already been there from the start.
No word on when I'll start chemo or radiation yet.  I guess I will know soon.  Gonna be a strange holiday season.